I do think this is a great idea though. I was thinking the other day as he did something, “wow, I’m so lucky I don’t have to do this because he’s here” but the reality is that I really should know how even if I don’t always do it.

I’m curious about the carbonated water thingie… is it so you can have fizzy drinks without drinking pop/soda/whatever? Like La Croix? Because I gave up pop and I miss the fizz and have been drinking La Croix, but really, the cost… ugh. But rigging my own, that might be worth looking into.

1. The caption of Wombat’s drawing.
2. It makes me feel better about things I can’t/won’t do. (One of which is also taking out the garbage. I did it when I had to, like, when my mom made me, my roommates were out of town. Now I live alone, so you’d think I’d have to take it out myself, but luckily, my apartment building has cleaning ladies (called “ayi” in China) who come by once a week to do light cleaning and they take out my garbage! So, for the majority of the past 10 months, I only had to take it out once in a blue moon, when it was overflowing. And now that I have a boyfriend, he takes it out when it’s overflowing! (Man Job? Maybe not exclusively, but in my brain, why not? Besides, sometimes I have to clean up the pee that’s on the floor in the bathroom because he missed the toilet.)
3. You guys do know you can buy carbonated water, right? I only ask because I’m worried about your safety. Well, mostly Simon’s safety because who would take the garbage out if something happens to him?

Champagne is easy. Hold the bottle at an angle, with your hand on the cork. Twist the bottle, slowly slowly, and eventually the cork will slide out with a little hiss. No pop! No cork flying, no bubbles spilling.

No tips on wine, though. I use that Rabbit opener thing because I’m terrible at using a regular corkscrew like a normal person.

I also don’t even know where our outside trash cans are, which is sad. And only recently discovered our compost pile. And I was the one who wanted the bin in the first place!

But let’s be clear about something: I still think he should be in charge of cocktails and hamburgers and trash and insect removal and things requiring safety goggles (I am including champagne here) because he’s always going to be better at them.

I can nail the pieces together without any trouble, but cutting them with the circular saw? I’m convinced I will chop off my hand. But I probably won’t. And I really want that heating duct hidden. So check back with me in a week or so to see if I managed to suck it up and conquer the power tool fear.

P.S. I used to use the weed whacker, one of the many chores that I dropped when pregnant and never picked up again. Weed whacking SUCKS A LOT and I encourage you to think hard about whether this is anything you want to get involved in.

Actually, if we are being honest, I think Chris could probably learn to do a few household things around here. He has a lot of aversions that he shouldn’t. Like dishes. Not a woman’s job!

Plunge a toilet.

Pull things out of the garbage disposal that don’t belong.

Scoop the kitty litter.

Take the trash cans to the curb.

* Things I do not do:

Dig holes (it’s rocky here).

Hang Christmas lights.

Fix shingles.