What a Difference
When Fox came out (of his foxhole) (apologies in advance; I have a million of these), our first reaction was, “Whoa. He looks nothing like Wombat. WHO IS THIS?”
“And who the hell are YOU people?”
You may remember I had a fair amount of pregnant anxiety over having a second child who would be *gasp* different than the first. Wombat was such a good baby, and I only now, in retrospect, realize that maybe part of my desire to have another baby was to relive Wombat’s babyhood again, even though, intellectually, I know that’s some seriously shabby intellectual reasoning because, duh, it doesn’t work that way, dummy.
There are people who have another child after a Hard Baby thinking #2 has to be easier than #1, and there are people who have another child after an Easy Baby thinking they have Easy Baby Genes so that’s what they’ll get again (a.k.a. they’re stupid and don’t know they’re supposed to work themselves into a fine frenzy because after an Easy they’re obviously due a hellion spawn for Round 2, since those are the rules). And then there’s me: following Wombat’s near-perfect infanthood, I was resigned to the dark fate of parenting a #2 that would surely be #1′s alter ego, the terrifying Hard Baby of myth and legend. He wouldn’t eat, he wouldn’t sleep, he wouldn’t be as smart or handsome or polite or charmingly curious as my dear chocolate-covered-and-wrapped-in-gold-foil Wombat. I was going to have to suck it up and slog through the rough parts and just hope it would all be worth it in the end.
Then came Fox the Real to replace Fox the Imagined and, oh, hello, he’s an ENTIRELY DIFFERENT PERSON than his big brother, and guess what? (Oh, you’ll never, ever guess.) He’s not only wonderful in his own ENTIRELY DIFFERENT WAY (uh…surprise?), but the fact that he’s not just a “second verse, same as the first” clone is actually exciting. He’s only two and a half weeks old, and already I’m simultaneously wishing I could keep him tiny forever while also aching for a sneak peek at who he will become in a year, two years, fifteen years…because, man, he’s not Wombat, but I think he’s going to be fun (too), this one.
In addition to being futile, trying to see into the future is like trying to contemplate the ever expanding universe–it will jack your mind a dozen ways to Sunday–which is probably why my brain has been looping the Meow Mix theme song for the past five or six days even though I’m not actually as sleep-deprived (*KNOCK ON WOOD*) or frazzled by new-again parenthood as I should be at this point in the game. (It helps that Fox has several times slept 5- to 7-hour stretches at night(!!!) and that with a first child already running around and, like, having a life and stuff, we haven’t been able to just STOP EVERYTHING because we have a new baby, and thus we find ourselves still go-go-going as much as usual, even though I basically planned to be destroyed for at least the first month. I am shocked. SHOCKED.)
Backyard campfire, 2 days old
Brunch, 5 days old
Picnic, 5 days old
Another picnic, 12 days old
Meanwhile, as I guess at my new son’s future to the tune of meow meow meow meow, I’m also beginning to learn who this little Fox is now. He’s calm and happy, and instead of crying he prefers to communicate his needs with a staccato of grunts and snorts. (Is that…Morse code?) “Why you trufflin’, little truffle pig?” Wombat asked him the other day, having picked up on my tendency to call Fox variants on that theme, including “the Truffler.” When he gets himself good and worked up–snout a-snortin’ and limbs a-flailin’–I announce (sometimes to no one) that he’s doing the Truffle Shuffle, of course.
He has short blond eyelashes, the most delicate brows, and eyes that seem angling to blue. His hair is already lighter than Wombat’s, and at certain times of day it even looks golden. He doesn’t mind the bath (“the” = his single bath since we came home from the hospital; some things never change), he actually likes the swing (W haaaaated it), and whereas Wombat falls asleep pretty reliably in the car (praise be), Fox clicks into the back seat and goes wide awake with wonder, seeming to marvel at the shadowy movements of the trees and cars and buildings of his 45-degree-angled world.
Also, Fox? He takes a paci. Amazing. Truism: I have been a mother for three and a half years, but I have only been this child’s mother for a few weeks. Everything is familiar and new again. A familiar newness? Something like that.
I’m reveling in the new–his newness and the novelty of him. I’m cradling him in my arms and my mind like you’re supposed to hold a bar of soap in your hand: don’t squeeze too tight lest he slip away.
Is Fox a different baby than Wombat? Yes. Does that mean he’s a Hard Baby? No, no, no. He eats (and how; up 1 lb. 4 oz. since birth!), he sleeps, he loves being carried in the wrap, and he calms when I sing. In all the best ways, he’s just like his brother. And in all the best ways, he’s just like himself, whomever that turns out to be. I can’t wait (but Time, go slow!) to see who that is.
One of my favorites; 25 hours old and busting with personality
Oh my GOSH, he is so adorable. And I think I see a lot of Leah in this Leah-and-Simon production … it’s in the eyes, I think.
I love this post. So beautifully written, so full of love. You’ve put into words all of *my* fears about my own imminent second baby (due on New Year’s day!). Because my first, my girl (just a few weeks younger than Wombat), was also this perfect, easy baby. She hardly cried. She slept. She ate like a champ (except for bottles. Nooo bottles. That is one thing I would very much like to be different this time). My in-laws kept joking that this had to be just a robot practice baby, and surely the “real” baby would come along soon. Nope. She was just that way. She’s turned into this awesome little person! I think I also want to re-live my girl’s delightful babyhood, which is, of course, not at all possible. The least of the reasons for impossibility is that this second baby will be a boy. OMG boy! What am I going to do with that? So much unknown, hopefully so much more delight. Even with trepidation, I can’t wait to find out.
Oh man, Wombat was a NO BOTTLE baby too, and getting Fox to take one is definitely on our agenda. The fact that he takes a paci is very promising. Fingers crossed for both of us!
And of course I wish you a very easy second baby! (Boys are AWESOME.)
Beaming with happiness for you four, over here. =) What a stunning child.
Fox is beautiful. Congratulations to your family!
(But you married an Arsenal fan?!
I married a guy whose sister married an Arsenal fan!
holy god that is a cute baby. so expressive! so cute! he looks and sounds just perfect. big yay to all of you!
We are right there with you on the go, go, go part of having a new baby with an older child. We went camping when she was 2 weeks (in a cabin with utilities, so not really camping) and we’ve been to the lake, etc. So different from last time but not that much more work. She just slipped right in, like she was always there.
So beautifully written. I’m 41 wks 1 day now and can’t wait to find out what #2 is like!
This perfectly sums up my experience with two children so far. Different? Yes. Worse? No. In fact some things are easier since my second will actually sleep in his bassinet ALONE, which my daughter never did (still doesn’t). I’m curious, though, about where exactly Fox is sleeping? I remember that being a bit of a dilemma.
He’s in a Pack ‘n Play in our room for now, which is great, since it’s literally one step from my side of the bed at night. We wanted to see what kind of a sleeper he was before we tried putting him in Wombat’s room, but if he keeps being a good sleeper, we’ll probably move him in there once he stops needing night feedings. Wombat CAN’T WAIT to have a bunk-bed arrangement. (Fox will be in crib under a platform bed.)
That second picture is the funniest thing I have seen in DAYS! I’ve cared for a lot of babies while working for my prior church’s nursery, and I have to say that is the best facial expression, ever! Your family is adorable, and while mine is in the very fledgling stages in developing ( i.e. found mate, set date ) I hope one day I have a much excitement and love as you do for yours. Well written and well loved, for sure.
He looks happy and healthy and cute as a button. Can’t help but laugh when I read about him not wanting to sleep in the car seat unlike his brother. It is exactly the same with our children. The first one sleeps the minute she gets into the car, the second not so much (but he sleeps everywhere else, so I won’t complain).
Congratulations on the new one. He looks like a winner.