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January 14, 2010

Don't You Wish

As a follow-up to that last entry, here's the postcard I was talking about, which was amazingly easy to find since it had been stored by my ├╝ber-organized pre-baby self. (These days I'm lucky to find my own head before noon.) It was filed in a folder marked "Cute stuff"--the postcard; not my head. The other contents of the folder were mostly kittens. Photos of them, I mean, although how awesome would it be to have a manila envelope of kittens filed away in case of emergency?

And, here, found in a folder marked "David Letterman" (following the folders labeled with the names of ex-boyfriends; coincidence?), is a mere sampling of my locker Lettermanorabilia. (Yes, there is more.)

Do you love how I scrapbooked the text together with the photo?

What does that even mean?

Whatever happened to Mujibur and Sirajul, anyhow? Some guy with Sirajul's same name is the editor of something called the Banglapedia.* Heh. Sadly, it's not what you think.

(Speaking of Letterman sidekicks, the last time I was in New York (with my recently-exed fiance and my parents; awkward!), we went into Rupert Jee's deli and totally geeked out about him giving us coffee and pastries. Now that's a celebrity who keeps it real.)

Finally--and coincidentally, I swear--to follow up on this week's post at Work It, Mom (I'm always so excited when my post makes the front page), here is what I wore to work from home today:

Don't you wish your WAHMma was hot like me?**

*The idea of a Banglapedia reminded me of something funny that happened a few weeks ago. We were at an..."adult" store and were looking at...books about...stuff...and (don't judge!) the baby was with us, and as Simon flipped through a publication entitled something like The Big Book of Penises, Wombat finally looked up from the toys he had been distracted with and started repeating his favorite word, out loud, for all to hear. "Banana! Banana banana banana!" Not catching on at first, I was all, "Yes! Banana! Good" until I realized what he was referring to, at which point we made a swift and red-faced exit. If anything, we probably helped them sell more condoms in the next ten minutes, right?

**Don't you wish your WAHMma were hot like I. God, Pussycats. Learn proper English if you want to protect your reputation as role models for the youth of America.

19 Comments

Darling, the book was entitled, "The Book of Big Penises" as in, "This is a Book With Photos of Very Large Penises."

Why doesn't Wombat ever say "Banana" when he sees me naked? Oh... never mind.

I am, I will have you know, the owner of a K&L's Rock America ballcap signed by Sirajul and Mujibur, from back in the day when they were appearing on the show regularly, and their job was pretty much to hang out in the store and sign autographs and pose for photos.

Photos like this one.

Um, Amy once pointed at Ron whilst he was taking a pee and said "Daddy, is that your finger?". Ron was most upset, he thought she should at least have said "Daddy, is that your arm?" Snort. Out of the mouthes of babes and all that!

Haha, that is awesome! Kids say the best things.

I only post to The Working Closet when I'm going out. I TOTALLY cheat.

Oh dear me, the banana story and the Simon comment, oh my - you kids, too funny!

Also, three cheers for the subjunctive mood!

What a brilliant little Wombat! =) It just gets better... K was in the room with me while I was changing and out of the blue asked, "that you cute little boobies, Mom?"

Er, yes.

I'm not sure if it would be better or worse if she were a boy.

Teach me, O English├ęd One: Why isn't it "Don't you wish your WAHMma were hot like I am"?

I'm just relieved to know I'm not the only one who didn't know what the fuck a "Varga Girl" is.

This whole entry was just terrific, I am not sure if which was better, actual proof of the Letterman Locker paraphernalia, or the book of big penises.
Also I am with jive turkey in the complete befuddlement about "Varga Girl"

Gretyl--The "am" is implied. It's like when you say, "Dance!" and the "you" is implied.

But ... but ... what if "like" is considered a preposition in that sentence? Then it's "me," because a preposition takes "me," not "I."

INQUIRING MINDS WANT TO KNOW.

Oh my God. I missed this entry yesterday and cannot we both wrote about the Giant Penis Book on the same day.

And yet, I kind of can.

To the people wondering about the grammar of that sentence, she was referencing a pop song... "Don't Cha" by the Pussycat Dolls, which (incessantly) repeats "Don't you wish your girlfriend was hot like me?"

Kristin--That's kind of insane. Does that make us...penis twins?

You've just reminded me of a t-shirt that I used to have that said, "Don't You Wish Your Girlfriend Could Knit Like Me."

I don't know where that shirt currently is, but I really hope I took it to Goodwill.

Aw good ol' Kim Anderson photography. She covered my 11 year old walls with tons of cute faces and kisses. So cute you saved it!

I'm pretty sure the correct form is "like me" not "like I." "Like" is preprepositional and therefore it takes "me" not "I." I could be wrong but that's what I remember from grade school.

I have fun with, result in I discovered just what I used to be taking a look for. You've ended my four day lengthy hunt! God Bless you man. Have a nice day. Bye

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