Publish and Perish
I have a friend who's a literary agent, and last week Simon blurted out in his presence that I have a novel in me (true) and would he be interested in looking over the first chapter and giving a critique? Skipping over the part where I blanched and then sought the nearest exit because (a) book people hate "I-have-this-friend-with-a-novel..." blindsides and (b) I've become extremely shy about my fiction in the years since I stopped actually writing it, the topic actually sparked an interesting discussion about writers vs. Writers, and good fiction vs. marketable fiction (not necessarily mutually exclusive, but I have my biases), and the various purposes and merits and end-goals of publishing (the verb, not the noun) in general.
Back when I actually wrote fiction (high school and college), I always said, "If I ever write something that ends up on the bestseller list, I'll die of shame," which HA HA, it's more likely I'd die of shock or of drowning while swimming in my kidney-shaped pool full of gold coins a la Scrooge McDuck. There are certainly worse ways to go is what I'm saying, which is why I'd like it to be known now that if anyone wants to put me on the bestseller list, I will not object.
Ahem.
So, although I'll freely admit now that my snub of The List back then was straight-up pretentiousness (pretention?), I give myself a retrospective pat on the head instead of a slap on the face because, come on, (a) I was a late-teen/early-twentysomething and pretentitude (yes!) is the law for that age group, and (b) it's easy to say stuff like that when you know the closest you'll get to The List is when you're restocking the shelf at the B&N where you work. (Any other B&N alums out there? Bloggers to the cash/wrap!) I mean, snubbing a club is best done when there's no way in hell you'll ever be invited to said club, right? And getting self-righteous about the bestseller list is like getting self-righteous about how you'd never go to Oprah's "Favorite Things" show because the greedy materialism makes you sick, but give me a break, you SO know you would go if you had a chance, even if you didn't keep everything you walked away with, so don't even act like you wouldn't.
Now, a decade later, there's still a little bit of truth to my feelings about The List and my potential inclusion on it, and although a large part of the sentiment springs from my general distaste of contemporary fiction (or at least the kind that's widely read), another factor is that I know that the kind of novel I want to eventually write--the one that's in me already, fully-formed and just waiting for me to choose its words, actually--is not something that would ever take America by storm. Would it be nice to take America by storm? Sure! Especially for hefty royalties and the anonymity of being word-famous instead of face-famous, but still...that's about as likely to happen as my getting drafted to the NBA as a 5'8", non-dribbling, basketball-hating person with a vagina. Okay, maybe that's not a good comparison because I can at least compose a grammatically sound sentence, and that's half the battle in writing (although you wouldn't know it by looking at some of the manuscripts I read).
The next question, then, is would you rather publish a bestseller that's not your best work, or would you rather write a novel you're uncompromisingly proud of but that never gets read and maybe never even gets published? (And by "proud" I mean proud of the novel, not proud of yourself for writing one, which is an entirely different thing.) For me, it's about writing the book, getting it out of my head and onto paper the way it should be, even if it only gets bound in a ten-copy family-and-friends special edition at Kinko's when I'm eighty years old. For me, it's not about being published, it's not about being read, and it's certainly not about becoming rich and famous. (If that's your goal, writing is the WRONG way to go about it. Better luck setting your kid aloft in a balloon.) Writing this novel (and I mean THIS novel, not just A novel) is a compulsion, something I'm driven to do, even though I predict it's going to be a very slow drive down a very long road.
Whenever I make the "successful"-vs.-quality argument, someone--usually Simon or my dad--gets all smart-assed and says, "Well, why don't you just write a crappy book first, get on the bestseller list, and then write your hoity-toity fancypants novel while America fills your kidney-shaped pool with gold coins?" To which I say, "Nice work if you can get it, boys, but even writing a crappy novel isn't easy. If that's what you think, why don't YOU write one and get on the bestseller list? I'll copyedit it for a meager share of your gold coins."
Also (and here's where I get pretentious again), I don't think that everyone who can write should write [for publication], and even more, I don't think that most people who can write are Writers. I, for instance, will admit (albeit under duress) that I can write, but I know with complete clarity that I'm not a Writer. I've read Writers before. I know a Writer when I read one. I am not a Writer. Does that mean I think I'm unworthy of publication? Or that I shouldn't even try to write (or Write), even just for myself? Of course not; and yet publication is but small beans in the stew of writing at its best--a stew that, I think, is watered down by a lot of the unworthy drivel that does get published, but that's also just a matter of taste. I guess what I want to say--to Simon, to my dad, to NaNoWriMo, to myself--is that I've got all the time in the world to write a Perfect Book that no one will read, so lay off. There are other ways to fill that pool. Like with jello.
What I find so fascinating about writing and reading is that so much of it is taste. There are plenty of bestsellers I've read (and you too, it seems) that I find to be complete garbage as far as written works go, but there's still SOMETHING there that's appealing (a world created, a enviable relationship, a really cool leading character, what have you). Additionally, I've read plenty of well-written books (The Memory Keeper's Daughter comes to mind) that weren't exciting or engaging or even interesting, in my opinion.
I suppose what I mean is well-written books don't have to be good books and badly or mediocre-written books can still be entertaining. Hey, read page one of Twilight and you'll die at how horrible the writing is but SOMETHING is there to make so many people from all demographics turn the page.
I'm not answering your question (or any question, ha!) that well at all, except to say that I don't think I'm much of a Writer either because so much of my writing is about connecting with another person, an audience, a community, and what you propose above (writing something phenomenal that no one will ever read) DOESN'T really appeal to me. If I can't share it -- even with a very small circle of people -- and connect with SOMEONE over the words, then it's less desirable a craft for me. I do think publishin/Internet marketing is evolving to create these small communities for less well-known authors that are really cool and that IS something I'd really enjoy.
Also, hey, I'm pretty ridiculously poor. It's hard to keep one's principles when the money runs out. If I were promised a college education for Kyle and yearly vacations, I'd jump at the chance of being on The List, even if it was with the post-its I write to Mike.
There are absolutely plenty of bestsellers that are bestsellers for reasons other than literary merit (dare I say most of them?), and there's nothing wrong with that. The list is, after all, descriptive of what people like, not prescriptive of what they SHOULD like, so that's pretty much a given. If most people don't read books for literary merit (and they don't, for better or for worse), the list is necessarily going to reflect that (and it does). And yes, a lot of this has to do with taste; I think most thinking people can tell the difference between what's Good and what's simply Enjoyable (e.g., your take on "Twilight"), and again, there's nothing wrong with that. I know that a Filet o' Fish isn't quality food, but that doesn't mean I don't love it to the core of my heart. I guess that with books I just feel more at home with the Nobel Prize crowd than the bestseller crowd, so that's who I would shoot for if/when I publish anything.
Also, I think of blog writing as in a completely different category than writing a finite piece of fiction and not just because it's a different genre with different conventions but specifically because its main goal is, I think, to connect to people. (Otherwise, why put it on the web instead of in a private journal?) Writers of fiction don't, I think, write as a way to open up a dialogue with their readers; even if they want to be read and they love getting feedback and they go out and meet people during book tours, I think it would be pretty dense for someone to think that writing a novel is the best way to connect with a community because, in the age of self-publishing/blogging, you can reach an audience faster, cheaper, on a larger scale, and on a deeper level than you ever could with a published book.
It definitely comes down to what a person wants to get out of writing: community, connection, self-expression, catharsis, celebrity, bags of money, or just ars gratia artis. I'm with you on blogging as a way to connect and form community, but when it comes to fiction, I definitely fall into that last category: I do it for its own sake, because I want to create a work of art.
Wanna be my friend on the NaNoWriMo site? Along with Kerri?
We can write for the sake of writing and also have a bit of community. Win, win!
Here's my problem with NaNoWriMo: November is pretty much the worst month to do that sort of thing. Why not August, people? Nothing happens in August!
I am always very careful to make sure people understand that I do not consider myself a writer, I just LIKE TO WRITE. Because - just like you said - I know Writers, and I am not one of their kind. I have a good friend who is so incredibly gifted and so (annoyingly) prolific, it's like he has to write around the clock just to get all the words (and they are wonderful, perfectly phrased words) out of his brain. He is a Writer. I just like to run my mouth. But - for what it's worth - I have always considered you a Writer.
Well, now you just went and made me think. Damn it. YOU KNOW HOW I HATE DOING THAT.
A friend of mine is a literary agent to many, many important people and when I met her son he was all, "you should write a book!" and then I was all, "Hahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaa". The end.
The sad part is when you do have a book in you - as I know that you do - and yet the getting it down on paper part is what is really difficult. And that is my life right now.