Protection
The smiles and laughter are so much better now that it's real smiles and real laughter, but the crying is likewise so much worse now that there are real tears. Poor little thing can't even wipe his eyes yet, so here I am, Official Tear Dryer, years before he's fallen and scraped his knee or fallen in love and bruised his heart. The smiles and laughter melt me down into liquid gold, but with tears I am shattered.
***
In the before time, whenever I'd hear about a mother breaking down over her child's immunizations, I never quite understood what the big deal was. Sure, a shot in the thigh is bound to make a kid cry, but so what? Babies cry all the time. Why, then, were parents everywhere so traumatized by this experience, especially when it's an experience arranged for the child's protection and out of love? Sack up, parents! You're not the ones getting stuck, and you can easily steal the concilatory lollipop if you want to.
What I didn't fully appreciate then is how different the hungry cry and the sleepy cry and the bored cry and the for-the-love-of-cheese-just-put-me-down-woman cry is from the hurt cry. I now know the hurt cry, and hence I now know what there is to be feared at the hands of the kindly pediatrician with the tough-love needle.
A few weeks ago Wombat was frolicking on his playmat and Linus was lying nearby, soaking in the lifegiving rays of the spaceheater, when Wombat, full of life and carpe-ing the diem as per usual, let out a barbaric yawp that in turn made Linus jump up and rocket across the room, bounding over the baby on his way. Wombat, so scared by Linus that he literally shit his pants (or maybe that was a coincidence), reacted not with a familiar cry but with a otherworldly SCREAM, like that of a helpless infant whose skin is being peeled off starting with his eyelids as convenient pull tabs. He was red and hot and inconsolable and just plain out of his little baby gourd for what felt like an eternity, and although I checked him for obvious injury and found nothing, I knew there must have been something wrong that I wasn't seeing. Later that day I found a cat scratch on his foot that, at over an inch long, was equivalent to a six-inch gash on an adult body. Ah ha--so that's the Hurt Cry. No wonder the intensity and pitch and volume was smashing me to pieces.
First thing tomorrow morning we take the little sprog for a two-month well-baby checkup and his first round of immunizations. Newborn Wombat wouldn't have minded, but Awake Baby Wombat definitely will. At best, he'll cry piteously for three minutes like he did when he slammed his forehead into my teeth last week; at worst, he'll scream for ten minutes and we'll have to pay for window repairs up and down the block. As for me, I might need a tranquilizer.
I love his hat! So cute! Best of luck!
Love that facial expression...and the inclusion of the Dead Poets reference :)
I thought that whole crying-during-shots thing (by the parents) was silly, too. Oh man, did I learn! There I was with my little baby and heard the Hurt Cry for the first time and fell to pieces in the peds office.
The worst part of first immunizations for me was seeing his face crumple and screw up as it dawned on him "hey, that hurt!" followed by the hurt scream. Luckily, as soon as I was able to pick him up and insert his binky, he quickly subsided to pathetic whimpering for a couple minutes and then was done. I think I cried more than he did.
And it was nothing compared to trying to comfort him while he was being catheterized and having IVs inserted, or sitting in the hallway listening to him scream as he was given a spinal tap during an ER visit.
I feel for any parent who has a chronically sick child, baby or not, that they have to see being put through pain like that on a regular basis.
Anyway, Wombat will get over it much sooner than you will. Just have a binky ready, if he takes one, or maybe you can nurse him for a few minutes after.
Oh yeah, the 2-month immunizations were the WORST. My daughter has never (and had never) screamed as much as she did after those evil needles went in. Our saving grace was that I nursed her immediately after the shots. She got a good belly-full, then went into a deep sleep in her car seat.
And beware! The shots can make a baby out-of-sorts for a few days afterwards. My daughter was tired and cranky and mildly feverish for 4 days after the 2-month shots. YUCK.
What type of camera are you using? The pics are so clear its like I can reach out and touch Wombat.
If you can nurse him DURING the vaccination, that can work wonders. It decreases the pain sensation (so says the nurse who did my baby's shots), and it worked well for us. No tears!
Oh man, yeah. My son stopped breathing for a few seconds so that his entire head could turn red and he could gather his forces for a mammoth SCREAM. And that was just one shot. Next week, he gets two. The good news is, he didn't show any side effects whatsoever, so other than a couple minutes of fussing and that initial giant scream, it wasn't too bad.
Yes, shots suck. Although, I am a bit stoic when it comes to them because I had a classmate die in 2nd grade from chicken pox.
When the kids get older, the shots get worse because they look at you, accusingly. Because they are AWARE that you are in on the game. Bah.
Before the shot comes down, I tell my kids it will hurt. While it is going on, I repeat over and over "It's okay - look at me". I say that over and over. Honestly? I think that is the way to go about it. It is hard not to cry myself, but I know that if I do cry, it will only upset them further.
Now that my kids are older, they don't really cry after shots - they whimper during the actual shot, but they let it go really quickly.
The poor little tootser, and poor you. I'm sure it will go well today, when all is said and done. But that doesn't make it easier. Man.
Oh, poor little guy! Shots are awful. Hopefully everything goes well.
Right after the shots, the nurse left and let us stay in the room so I could nurse. I think that made both of us feel better.
What makes it worse, is that they have no idea what is coming. They are laying on the table all happy and cooing and then suddenly they get this surprised look on their face that turns to outrage and then THE CRY.
When my son was a baby and we went for his first shots, I made my husband go with me. I held the baby and he held me. It sucked.
And last year when he had to have pre-Kindergarten shots (4!!!) it was even worse. I was nauseous heading to the appt and, bless his heart, my boy barely even made a noise. But the look on his face was enough to nearly stop my heart.
The nice thing about shots when they're older, though, is that you can give them ice cream afterwards. :)
I second the idea of nursing while the shots are being given. I nursed my son for a minute or two before the doctor gave him the shots. He pulled off for a moment to voice his displeasure, but then he latched back on and was calm as could be. It saved both of us a lot of tears.
I love the picture. He's a cutie.
Aw, hang in there =) I hope it's closer to the three-minute cry than the ten-minute wail, poor baby. Good luck making it through in one piece.
I was always scared that the baby would totally bite into me as he got the shot, so I was TOO afraid to nurse at the time of contact. Yeah, doctor appointments suck. But on the bright side, that is one freakin adorable baby you got there! Makes me so excited for the bun in MY oven :)
Good luck. I love the boob cure - my absolute fave for sadness.
i am seriously the worst mom ever. the first shot, with my first baby, pained me. but that was pretty much the only one. they are so quick and they cry for two seconds and then you comfort them and then it's over.
that being said, i hope it goes okay for you!!!! ;)
Do you think it would hurt if I ate his cheeks? Or maybe just his lip? Oh my holy puckered lip.
Good luck!
The worst for me was the son's circumcision. OMG, it about killed me. The shots weren't much better though. It's so hard when you're not sure what's bothering them!
Steff--It's a cheapo 50mm lens on my trusty old Canon Rebel XT. Every once in a while it's magic.
Mike and I *think* Kyle is dealing with a little bit of baby colic or reflux or possibly just some digestion issues, and because of it, he has an "in pain" cry that kills me. I never thought my baby's cries would shatter me in such a way, but long after he's done crying, I am in need of some serious consoling. It's just been unexpectedly awful to hear that one particular cry.
thank you! :-)
Yes, the Hurt and Betrayed cry will bring you to your knees. Unlike anything else in the world. Glad you made it through okay!!!