Stupid Is as Stupid Does
At my old office, we always had a supply of paper plates and plastic utensils in the kitchen, and although I generally frown on such wastefulness (save the environment! do it for the cheeeldren!), the thought of handwashing dishes and silverware at work pisses me off. Now that we're in a new building with a kitchen so small the disposable lunchware has to be stored on a completely separate floor (wtf?), I'm in an even greater pickle. On the one hand, I still need to eat lunch. On the other hand, I still refuse to handwash non-disposable dishes at work (with that nasty old sponge and the lukewarm water that has none of the disinfecting powers necessary when sharing spoons with coworkers? no thanks). And on the other hand, I'm not about to risk going into labor (more on that below) to make a trip down and back up the stairs for paper plates every day (because neither am I going to stash a supply in my filing cabinet), and so what's a girl to do? The current routine is to bring the dirties home with me (plates smeared with burrito drippings, utensils coated with dried chocolate pudding--everything goes into my (reusable) lunch bag), throw them in our dishwasher, and then return them to the office kitchen in a (sometimes) timely manner. Tell me: Am I insane?
In related news, if one train called Frugality and another train called Laziness crashed in a little hamlet called Pregnancy Complications, USA (pop. Me), what kind of disaster would result? On Sunday morning, I refused to go to the hospital or call my doctor (because she would have just told me to go to the hospital) after I'd had regular (but not painful) contractions every three to five minutes for over an hour. I was convinced I was just dehydrated and, uh, "overstimulated," and promised Simon that if I just had a big jug of water and a lie-down I'd be fine. Which I was. Fine. Totally totally fine. I drank my jug of water, scarfed some waffles, and reclined with a magazine. End of drama.
Still, it was a little scary, in part because I was having regular contractions for a significant amount of time at only 30 weeks along, but also because, wow, am I really that stubborn about what constitutes a medical emergency and what can just be waited out? Apparently, yes. I didn't want to go to the hospital because I have a $100 co-pay and too much stuff to do to spend four hours hooked up to an IV of water, and it's not like I was in pain or leaking or anything, and I could always go to the hospital if things got worse, right? Luckily, things didn't get worse and I'm fine (so long as I don't lift anything, stand up too fast, or climb stairs) and I was probably just dehydrated and "overstimulated." I don't need to pay a doctor $100 and four hours to tell me that.
And yet...What if all of these contractions (which I started feeling at around four months and which have not gotten painful but certainly more frequent) are not just harmlessly readying my uterus for labor but are actually dilating and effacing my cervix? What if? What then? The only way to find out for sure, of course, is to have someone check BUT (here we go again), my next doctor's appointment is in two weeks, and there's a $25 copay for every office visit, and what if she tells me I'm dilating and need to be on meds and indefinite bedrest and can't get on a plane to my baby shower this weekend? What then?
I'm wondering if I can find someone else to just check my cervix for free and with no strings attached. You know, just to check. Any takers or do I have to go downtown and sit on a streetcorner with a sign?
(I AM INSANE.)
Are you kidding us, woman? CALL YOUR DOCTOR TOMORROW MORNING OR THE INTERNET WILL DO IT FOR YOU.
Well, uh, THEN you will take meds, go on bedrest and not get on the plane. Easy. =)
Um. I think I can safely say that I'm with whatever Simon says on this one. Even though I am preaching this lecture directly into my own ears. Nothing is worth risking the baby's safety. Don't regret not going. Ignorance is NOT bliss in this case.
And thank god for people like Simon and Superman who balance us in these moments of frugal insanity. =)
This is coming from a completely loving place, so forgive me for the bluntness: don't be a dumbass, missy. $100 is not worth whatever could happen to you or the little one if you waited too long. You obvs. know that but I'm just reminding.
I'm pretty sure that if you want someone to check your cervix for free, all you have to do is go on Craigslist. You should be careful though, as to not catch the slut rabies.
And about the cutlery? The creepy man in my office (the one who is going to one day snap and shoot us all) washes a supply of plastic cutlery at the start of each month. He then pairs off said cutlery, in knife and fork pairs, wraps it in plastic wrap, and secures it with a rubber band. He makes enough cutlery pods for the month and stores them in the top drawer of his desk. I'm trying to work up the courage to snap a photo but I'm pretty sure that he has his desk wired with a camera.
Hey, insane girl, do what the rational people above me recommend. Obey medical advice, especially if it comes cheaper than $30/hour by your own reckoning.
What did your mom say (if memory serves she's a pediatric nurse, right?)? Hope wombat settles down soon-but definitely spend the $100, or schedule a $25 doctor's visit.
Good luck with whatever you decide!
whenever my parents or friends have some disturbing thing happen to their bodies and they're worried about it, but don't wanna go 'cuz they think it'd be a waste of money, i always urge 'em to go anyway. . . in your case my logic is that yeah, you may be fine, and you may have had to just shell out $100 for a copay, but $100 is probably worth the peace of mind for you and your man. . .
*but*, at the same time, i hear you on not wanting to go 'cuzza that long-ass wait. . . i drove my friend to the alta bates emergency room once and we had to sit around from 10pm 'til 7am just to hear the doctor come up and say, "you're fine, go home". . . in the end tho', she was glad she went. . .
as far as the dishes, why don't you give 'em a cursory wash at work so they're not totally grody when you stick 'em in your lunch bag, and then throw 'em in your dishwasher once you get home?. . .
Actually I had someone the other day check my cervix for free. But at 41 weeks past due you do crazy things.
Um I think you would really know if you need to go and you wouldn't risk a thing. And if it didn't cause crazy between you and Simon then you were right to do what you need.
Good Luck though! Don't want regrets!
Ok, so I've also been feeling contractions regularly since about 18 weeks and am now 33 weeks. I've been reading your blog regularly, too, and I am mostly on board with the "as long as it's not painful and not leaking it must be fine" mentality. BUT... if you are planning to get on a plane and go far away from all the medical professionals who know you and your history, I have to recommend that you first suck up the $25 to have the cervix checked and get the go-ahead.
Really, you don't want to go into premature labor on a plane. Or miles away from anyone who you trust to deliver your baby under emergency conditions.
I think your peace of mind is worth $25. Don't you?
Yes?
Good. Make an appointment.
Ha! Oh, Lord. You and I are exactly the same when it comes to calling the doctor. Every time I get a new little ache or pain, I'm afraid to mention it b/c Brad insists I call the midwife center (which is in a hospital) and I KNOW they'll probably want to see me, and I want to avoid the entire circus you mentioned above. But do as I say and not as I do: CALL THE DOCTOR. Now you can tell me to do the same (and we can possibly both ignore each other).
Two things and not necessarily in the most important order....
1. girlfriend has to get over the environment until she is at least no longer pregnant and stash some stuff in your desk drawers and then toss it out in the trash - temporarily ok? remember, it is just temporarily
2. I went into pre-term labor with my first child at 28 weeks. At 30 weeks, at 32 weeks, at 34 weeks, at 36 weeks and then the stubborn little thing didn't make an appearance until I was induced at 40+ weeks
3. I went into pre-term labor with my second child at 24 weeks (at which time they discovered I had 3 herniated disks in my low back and suggested I have back surgery then, to which I suggested they jump off a cliff, but that's another story for another time) and was put to bed. Because of the herniated disk things (I just typed herniated dicks and it made me giggle a little), I was to stay in bed unlike with my first pregnancy when I was to be "house bound" but not "bed bound", the second one was true bed rest. I still went into labor again at 28 weeks, at 30 weeks, at 32 weeks, 2 times in one week and was hospitalized, at 34 weeks and 3 days after I got out of the hospital from the 34 week pre-term labor, I was 35 weeks, with what they U/s tech deemed a big baby (and I had taken the steroid injections for the baby's lungs, which is an important reason to let the doctor know b/c if the contractions are doing anything to your cervix, you want to get that round of steroids for the baby's lungs and they can't all be given in one day, I think 3 days apart) and so on the day I turned 35 weeks, that little 6 pound 6 ounce 5 week early baby came into this world healthy as he could be......(it was T-giving day, I'd been given permission to be un-bound to the bed at 35 weeks and if he came, he came. So, I got an attitude and told my husband and mother "I'm going to my grammy's to eat lunch, you can go or stay home but I'm going"..Then, I spent the entire day listening to every family member, including grammy and my a neonatal nurse plus a radiologist griping at me about being out of bed, and I told them in no uncertain terms to shut up, I'd be fine. By 4 pm, I was headed to l/d to have a baby and had protein in my urine)
Moral of the story, (everyone has a pregnancy story worse than yours and I HATE it when people try to compare stories - oops) you don't know...go see. Now, with child number one, I went to l/d 8 times between 28 weeks and that plus 40 weeks, and with second child from 24 weeks to that 35 week day, I went to l/d 12 times. It got to the point where I could hook myself up to the monitor and the nurses could do the paperwork without me (just kidding...a little).
Anyway, several of those times I was just de-hydrated. But, that general rule is (or was by my doc) if you think you are dehydrated, then hydrate well for four hours, while lying down. Yea can you get strangled (just kidding again), and if there is still any action at all, GO TO L/D. You need to at least call the office and ask them what their policy is.
If I just had the money I spent on l/d co-pays, we could take a nice vacation some where, lol. Either way, our insurance paid all my l /d visits the second time but the first time we had a different insurance. Are you sure you have to pay if you go to l/d, most pregnancy/labor/delivery charges are lumped together? I can't believe you have to pay a co-pay for office visits either (all the more reason to call and not go in though).
Our insurance put up front the amount we we responsible for, the dr's office made us pay it by 12 weeks I think (it was like $250) and the insurance paid every thing else from there on out. Double check that (as if you haven't already and I know more about this than you do, duh), just to be sure though.
Sorry, I had no plans to rant, I don't know what happened. My fingers get diarrhea sometimes this early in the morning. Sorry again and double sorry for the my pregnancy versus yours story....I feel so bad..no bad enough to delete but I do feel bad.
Are you serious right now? For crying out loud, GO TO THE DOCTOR. GO GO GO.
Hmm. I'm torn between telling you to go to the doctor, you crazy woman (who I don't even know. Hi, by the way.) and telling you to go sit on a streetcorner with a sign and have someone investigate the cervix situation for free. Because if that's not good blog fodder I dont' know what is.
I'm sorry, but I'm mad too. Are you kidding me?? $25 is what's holding you back from getting checked? I'll send you the money myself. Aye!
My SIL had a friend check her cervix for free (not just a random friend, this one is an OB nurse!) to make sure she really needed to make the 45-minute drive to the hospital at 3:00 a.m.
I had a similar situation, but I went to the hospital, and sat there for four hours and got multiple checks which eased my mind greatly. You and I are only a week apart and at this stage in the game, take no risks man. I'm sorry to hear your insurance is wonky, all my prenatal care is covered (minus the first visit) even emergency stuff so I can understand the "waiting out" theory. I don't know what I would do if I had to pay $100 for something like that, as I have no husband and no help. I too have also been having routine BH contractions and have exercised the "waffles and napping" method of recovery. You will feel better if you get checked, but that's up to you. Who knew all this crap was so complicated. Best of luck to you, you're almost there, almost.
I would at least call and be specific about your symptoms. They won't ask you to come in if they don't think it's serious. I had spotting early on and I freaked, but when I called and told them, spotting, no cramping, they said lay down, call if it gets worse. It didn't. Baby is fine.
As much as I hate going to the doctor and as much as I hate spending money on a copay when I could have bought new shoes AND (probably the most important thing) since I don't have any actual experience with being pregnant; I would advise you to go to the doctor. I mean, just in case and you're right, it probably is nothing but I get worried in these situations especially when it's someone I care about very, very much.
(Does it count as assvice when I end my assvice giving with telling you that I care about you a lot?)
Wow you are so committed to saving the earth by bringing home the dishware to wash it. Not that it's the best choice but they do make biodegradable cutlery that is a type of plastic so you can throw it away.
I'm not going to give you dr advice as currently my facebook status says "wondering if a two week long migraine is when I should call the dr." that and I've been self treating what I believe to be a bladder infection for the last two days. And I live where health care is free so what is my excuse?
Sweet jesus just go to the doctor! That's gotta be better than paying off some homeless dude to check, right?
I am unemployed (uh, between jobs, ahem) and I will paypal you $25 plus a fiver for gas if you go to the GD doctor, already.
Not insane!
(About the kitchen utensils, that is. Far be it from me to pass judgment on your decision to go or not to go to the doctor. As we liberals like to say, it's your body!)
(But also, hope everything is OK!)
I do exactly the same thing - take the plastic utensils home and put them through the HOT and SANITIZING dishwasher. The lukewarm water and nasty sponge is icky.
Its not preterm labor, trust me. Its not. It would hurt and you would know that it was labor. that is good old braxton hicks contractions and there is a lot more of that in store for you before 40 weeks. Hydrate, lie on your left side and believe me you will KNOW when it is real.
I think it's worth a call to the doctor's nurse, but I would put money on the fact that you are just fine. If the contractions had been legit, they wouldn't have gone away.
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