April 16, 2008
Happy Tears
This might not make me very popular, but I think that for some people pregnancy "symptoms" aren't symptoms at all. Sleepy? Absentminded? Ravenous? Alert the media, I'm having a perfectly normal day! This is one of the things that makes the stretch between ovulation and test day so crazymaking: you should have seen all the symptoms I had those months I wasn't pregnant. Just call me Baronness von Munchausen, book me a suite in the maternity ward, and warm up the pitocin; I'm on my way!
Don't get me wrong--a lot of symptoms are indeed just that. It's hard to argue with six weeks of barfing (none here!) or sore boobs (ow!), but when it comes to craving a brownie at midnight (assuming I can stay awake that long), I think that can often fall neatly into the category of Calling It a Pregnancy Symptom Because It's a Convenient Excuse for Less than Desirable But Entirely Normal Behavior. Take, for instace, a woman Simon and I know who was a complete and raging bitch throughout the gestation of her son. "The baby makes me cranky!" she would say, and whoa nelly, was "cranky" an understatement. The thing was, this woman acted like that all the time, since well before she was pregnant, and although I'm sure pregnancy hormones might have led to an increase in her *air quotes* irritability, if I had to put money on it, I'd say she was just letting it all hang out because she could and no one was going to tell her to shut up.
My symptoms have been extreeeemely minor (so far), and although it's still early, I'm understandably nervous about another miscarriage, especially considering that I hardly had any symptoms last time either. The way I think about it, the more different the early weeks of Preg v.2 are from Preg v.1, the calmer I will be. This means that although I'm on my hands and knees daily, I am not genuflecting to my lucky stars for their grace in having allowed me to avoid morning sickness (so far) but I'm instead praying to the god of toilet bowls (Mr. Clean?) that he could allow me just one easy little morning puke as reassurance that everything will be okay. (First I don't get to take my pants off at the doctor's office and now I don't even get to vomit?! Unfair!) (See also: the baby is making me irrational.)
This is all to preface telling you that when I received the results of my blood test today, I may have teared up a little upon hearing that both my hCg and progesterone levels are gloriously fine (aaaaaaand I don't have syphilis! woo! pop open the Martinelli's!). Now, I definitely tear up at a good movie or book or blog entry (contest winner coming soon!) but I'm not someone who gets outwardly emotional over, say, commercials about dish soap because, gawd, that poor woman's floor was so dirty and now it's SO CLEAN! *sob* I'm a tender heart to be sure, but it hardly ever surfaces in the form of a surreptitious eye dab with a lace hanky (or an ugly mascara-river cry because Oprah. She is so magnanimous. *waaaaah*).
So when I cried a little today at my test results (and a little yesterday when the nurse said, "You guys are having a baby!" and then did a little softshoe) (and, okay, maybe teared up a little looking through my complimentary book of coupons for maternity wear and professional baby photography), I still can't believe that it's the fault of the hormones. The middle-of-the-night pee breaks and subsequent insomnia? Sure. The bloating. Absolutely (because I need to blame that on something). But blame hormones for making me emotional over the fact that I am, thus far, healthy and normal and well on my way to a happy ending? Not a chance. Because how could I not be emotional? This isn't just a sappy story or a TV commerical about a mob of tween skateboarders who really dig the fresh and funky taste of SunnyD. It's the creation of LIFE. My god, that's my kid in there.
Posted by Leah at April 16, 2008 02:40 PMsee, now i've always been of the opinion that the kids in the sunny d commercial were on crack 'cuz what kid *wouldn't* prefer the purple stuff?. . .
|P|U|R|P|L|E| |S|T|U|F|F|
the purple stuff is my anti-drug. . .
Posted by: bloopy at April 16, 2008 05:06 PMEat all the brownies you want, chica. You deserve every last one for the miracle of the next 9 months. And Simon can have one, if you're willing to share. But only if you're willing! :)
Posted by: Sarah at April 16, 2008 05:32 PMmmm, brownies! great news on the results!
Posted by: Super Sarah at April 16, 2008 06:30 PMAh, I love these entries. Keep 'em coming.
This is what pregnancy is about - Feverish Excitement Mixed With Two Parts Trepidation and Much Love.
Posted by: cagey at April 16, 2008 06:33 PMCongrats on the syphilis thing! (And the blood test.)
Posted by: Sara at April 16, 2008 07:35 PMI am all irrationally emotional for you. So wicked.
Posted by: Kristin at April 16, 2008 08:51 PMI'm going to be an auntie! When do I get my sash and crown?
Posted by: Heather B. at April 16, 2008 09:14 PMYay, that IS your kid in there... that's all I have to say.
Posted by: Elizabeth at April 16, 2008 09:36 PMsara's "congrats on the syphilis!" is probably one of the best comments i've ever seen. . .
Posted by: bloopy at April 16, 2008 10:44 PMWhen I read posts like this, I realize just how much you've wanted this, and how long you've waited to be able to cry over blood test results. :)
And I think I may be guilty of blaming my irrational/cranky behavior on monthly hormone surges, when I'm actually just being a bitch. Oops.
Posted by: jive turkey at April 17, 2008 06:44 AMYour child will be so lucky because his/her parents wanted him/her so much. It is too bad that not all children in this world are loved and wanted. (Maybe I'm being hormonal but I'm feeling moved by your post).
Thanks for sharing the wonderful news with us.
Posted by: Green Eyes at April 17, 2008 07:03 AMThe pregnancy syptoms of the not pregnant woman - I can totally relate to those. As for my crying no one will ever believe it to be a hormonal thing the day I'm actually pregnant. Write more, write more...
Posted by: Drew at April 17, 2008 09:03 AMI was doing the happy dance in week 5 and 6 because I thought I was going to get out of morning sickness but then week 7 came around and it all hit me. I wish you a nice little a.m. puke in the next few weeks just to prove all is right in your belly. Also, I heard my kid's heartbeat yesterday and let me tell you, I'm still crying happy tears 24 hours later.
Posted by: Andrea at April 17, 2008 09:43 AMI cried before I was pregnant every time I saw "A Baby Story" on TLC.
I cry now every time I see "A Baby Story."
Just the cheesy intro music makes me well up.
(Sending the best uterine vibes I can muster...)
Posted by: helenjane at April 17, 2008 09:44 AMI remember the exhaustion so well. With my first, before I had even taken a test, I was leaving work one evening and walked up to the elevators. I remarked to my co-worker that I was so tired I was unable to lift my hand to push the button. She laughed and asked if I was pregnant. I said "No, of course not!" Joke was on me.
Posted by: Chris at April 17, 2008 10:19 AMI linked to you! :)
http://stephkneek.livejournal.com/65164.html
Eeeek! I've been on a self-imposed blog reading hiatus in the hopes of Accomplishing Things, just saw this post and screamed through the archives to read the backstory. Such HAPPY, WONDERFUL news!
Also, can I just mention how much I giggled when you called your little nugget a wombat? Like, so much I think Baby In The Belly should be known as Wombat. Here, of course. Might be a bit of a burden to go through life with the actual name Womabt.
Also, how cute is this baby going to be, for real? You and Simon as the parents? I can't wait.
Also again (GOD I'm wordy, I'm sorry, I'm so so excited for y'all, even though you're internet strangers), I was born in September and I have always, always wanted a Christmas or C. Eve birthday. Maybe your wee wombat will think it's the COOLEST thing ever.
Posted by: Ky Eliza at April 17, 2008 10:55 AMI didn't puke at all during my pregnancy (except when I tried to induce with Castor oil...) and I was never really nauseous, either. Strange, but I'll take it. I had the sore boobs, dry mouth, and some other stuff - all of which I blamed on the pregnancy - but don't think that just because you don't have "typical" symptoms, your pregnancy is not going to end with a perfect, beautiful baby. I rather enjoyed my uneventful pregnancy - and I know you will, too!! :)
Posted by: Audrey at April 17, 2008 11:07 AMI'm all emotional for you!
When I was pregnant, I didn't get much more weepy then I do when I am PMS-ing.
What I DID get was super giggly. Something random would get me started and before I knew it I couldn't breathe and the tears were flowing. It was crazy. But fun.
I am SO happy that the numbers are good, and I cannot WAIT to see your baby bump in July :)
Posted by: Angella at April 17, 2008 12:21 PMI should have commented on your announcement post but I've been kind of busy at work. Anyway, I think this baby bidness is just lovely. Big congrats to you and Simon!
i'm so incredibly happy and excited for you. i've read your blog for years and feel like i've rejoiced and sorrowed right along with you. this precious little one will be so cherished. thank you for sharing it all, along the way.
Posted by: kat at April 18, 2008 07:32 AMHow rapturous. I agree about the symptoms, some people justify through "inevitable pregnancy tendencies," hooey!
However, don't let anyone kid you pregnancy, plus prenatals with iron equals debilitating constipation. Buy iron-free. Trust me.
Enjoy!
Posted by: amanda at April 19, 2008 03:56 AMoh yeah! yeah! yeah! what great news to come home from vacation to!
sending hugs and morning sickness....
Posted by: trish at April 19, 2008 12:52 PMSo yeah, I was puking two days after the test... but I was also really late and didn't know... Pretty dumb.
And I so blamed being a bitch on being pregnant. More than likely though? It was because I quit smoking.
Posted by: Kimberly C at April 23, 2008 01:41 PM
