January 24, 2008
Shoes to Fill
In one of the early entries of the first incarnation of this blog, way back in 2004, I waxed embarrassingly poetic about a pair of $160 boots from the Victoria's Secret catalogue. Having learned in the first segment of that entry that opportunity is not a lengthy visitor and that if I wanted those boots I couldn't hem and haw over them but must snap them up, right then, right NOW, I hopped online and ordered the boots as fast as my pointer finger could click, only to find in my mailbox several weeks later a refund check and a note informing me they were out of stock in my size and the boot was being discontinued. Foiled!
In the four years since, I have been obsessed with finding the perfect boots--knee-high, sturdy and modest heel, not too pointy or too square or too round at the toe, just the right shade of brown, just the right embellishments, not crazy expensive. Oh, and comfortable too. I've looked for them in every shoe store, in every city, in all the usual places, and the closest I've come to boot nirvana was a window display of Caprice brand knee-highs in a store in Burford, Oxfordshire, last November, but I didn't even dare try them on because they were something like 170 pounds and, lordy, do you know how weak the American dollar is these days? (Also, I'm kind of a puss about carrying out business in foreign countries, even if English is the official language, and don't make fun of me for it until you've heard about the time I almost died of embarrassment over a chips/crisps/lettuce/salad mixup in a sandwich shop near the Globe on my first trip to England.) (Also, did you know that in England "pants" means underwear? I didn't. Be ye warned.)
Flash forward to a few weeks ago when I saw what looked like maybe quite possibly the perfect pair of boots on a shelf in a store in which everything was 50 to 70 percent off, except, of course, the boots I wanted. But I wasn't thwarted by the price! No! I would pay whatever the cost to have those boots! I was resolved! They shall be mine! No, I wasn't thwarted by the price but instead thwarted by the store only having one pair left, and that pair being a size 6, which would have been great had I been age 6, but last I checked I wasn't.
(Because I'm a puss in America too,) Simon was kind enough to ask a sales associate if they had any my size at another store--they did, times two--and then three or four weeks went by and I just knew both pairs were long sold to some other lucky size 10s and I would die bootless and alone, van, river, etc., and so it was with heavy heart and a glass half empty that we drove last weekend to a mall in the faraway magical kingdom of Suburbia to hopefully try on a pair of boots that just might end my quest once and for all, and with very little bloodshed.
Long story short, I bought them and then came home to realize I don't have a thing to wear with them, save a skirt that is so short I must have been six years old (or six inches tall) when I bought it. Nevertheless I wore the boots around the house for a day, tried them with knee socks, insoles, jeans (even tucked in, so help me god), and still wasn't sure they were going to work. There wasn't anything particularly wrong with them, per se; they were just a little different from what I'd pictured in my head all those years, which wasn't even a memory of those Victoria's Secret boots I'd first fell in love with but something altogether, something I'd idealised to the point of there being little chance I'd ever find boots that would fulfill the fantasy, if, indeed, they existed at all.
So now I had these boots and I wasn't sure what to do with them. It was a lot of money to spend on something that I wasn't sure I could pull off. It was a big committment to make to something that wasn't quite the way I'd imagined it would be. But these things don't always come without sacrifice, without hardship, without forcing expectations and standards to shift. Sometimes they turn out to be a different than what you'd hoped for. Sometimes, especially at first, they will feel a little clunky, a little pinchy, a little not-quite-something, and you'll wonder if you are settling or if you'd simply spent too much time fantasizing and are now beyond help when it comes to having a normal relationship...with boots, I mean.
But then you (then I) realize (yet again) that good things come if you are (if I am) patient. And with time comes the clarity that what I have is different, yes, but wonderful, and that it works, and that in many ways it's far better than what I'd imagined, and that rather than turn down something because it wasn't an obvious and easy choice from the start--doesn't it seem like everyone else can buy boots, tra la, without an ounce of complication?--it's now time to take this choice in my hands, warm it up, mold it, wear it around, and then start building my wardrobe around it because, lady, you've waited for this, and now you have it, it's really finally yours, and it's going to be with you a very very long time.
Yeah, this entry is not entirely about the boots.
Posted by Leah at January 24, 2008 01:51 PMconratulations!
(on finding the boots, of course!)
congratulations! (on finding the boots, of ourse!)
Posted by: heather at January 24, 2008 05:10 PMit appears i can't comment without a typo. in my defense, i'm typing with a 2 week old in one arm.
Posted by: heather at January 24, 2008 05:11 PMMy boots difficulties are different than yours, but I feel your pain. The surface, part about boots pain. (My issue is that I can't find boots made of anything but pleather that can accomodate my excessively large calves.)
Posted by: Emily at January 24, 2008 05:16 PMCongrats--on the boots and anything else that may deserve congratulating :)
Posted by: She Likes Purple at January 24, 2008 05:32 PMSo what do they call pants? Trousers? I always get terrible blisters from boots. Congrats on your new boots! I am excited to hear what this post is really about!! =)
Posted by: Monica at January 24, 2008 05:44 PMI tend to read WAY into things, so I am just going to say "congratulations on the boots, darling" and leave it at that.
Posted by: clink at January 24, 2008 05:58 PMI'm just glad you didn't order him -- I mean, THE BOOTS -- from a Victoria's Secret catalogue. It just wouldn't be as good of a story.
Posted by: Lawyerish at January 24, 2008 06:12 PMI still remember your introductory post about Simon and how thrilled I was. Now here you two are, years later, and yes, I'd say those boots were made for walkin' (gosh, I'm a nerd).
Posted by: Amanda Brown at January 24, 2008 07:15 PMI didn't think it was possible to love you more as a friend and as a person and yet I do.
Posted by: Heather B. at January 24, 2008 07:34 PMCongratulations on the boots! ;-)
Posted by: cagey at January 24, 2008 08:00 PMYay boots... and other good things that come when you wait ;)
Posted by: Elizabeth at January 24, 2008 08:38 PMIt's bizarre to read back to that post and a world where Simon wasn't the obvious And A Boy in your life - and look! There I was! A couple comments down!
Rock the fuck on, continued.
Posted by: Krissa at January 24, 2008 08:41 PMDude, I love you and yours so much my heart is embiggened.
Posted by: Helen Jane at January 24, 2008 09:04 PMI looooooove this post, Leah!!! Congrats and shots of single malt all around :)
Posted by: Brooke at January 24, 2008 09:13 PMI remember that good things come post and I still love reading it as much as I did back then!
Posted by: beck at January 24, 2008 09:34 PMYeah! (For the boots, of course, and whatever the news is, unless it's nothing more than finding truth & love in life and what it all means, but even that's worth offering congratulations!)
And I just realized I've been reading your blog for a long time and it's still as lovely as the first time. :)
The boots sound just perfect, and I am sure you will wear them very well. Congratulations!
Posted by: Catherine at January 25, 2008 01:27 AMCongratulations! Now could I have a pair of boots too?
Posted by: Drew at January 25, 2008 06:32 AMOnly you could make me all warm/fuzzy/weepy when talking about boots.
But of course boots were not the main subject, now ere they? :)
Posted by: Angella at January 25, 2008 07:14 AMI feel your boot pain and I know what you mean about getting them and then not having anything to wear. And if the hidden message is what I believe it to be then I get that too. And I promise sometimes, when it isn't what you planned for or what you expected it turns out to be so much better.
Posted by: Mama Urchin at January 25, 2008 08:01 AMRight, so the pants/underpants is confusing but not as mortifying as my "fanny pack" faux pas. (Just to clarify, I wasn't wearing a fanny pack, I was talking about a fanny pack.) Which resulted in one of the most hilarious conversations I've had with random drunk people in England, as "fanny" is slang for lady bits and they thought I was talking about some sort of vagina bag.
Posted by: hills at January 25, 2008 08:52 AMYep, I had the same problem. I need a pair of black boots and it took me years to find a good pair, small size, right height, not too trendy, not too basic. Maybe it's common? Anyway, congratulations on finding the perfect pair!
Posted by: Andrea at January 25, 2008 09:39 AMFrickin' sweetness!
I don't read between any lines well (because I am somewhat of an idiot), so I'm going to go ahead and say congrats on everything. It seems to be in order.
Posted by: Aunt Becky at January 25, 2008 10:10 AMTo quote Sex and the City:
You "have a very lovely life"
Posted by: Sarah at January 25, 2008 10:58 AMNext time you're in jolly old England, you should run around in nothing but boots, pants and a "jumper."
Texas is the only place to find real boots.
Good things come to those who wait. We've just got to do at least a little of the go-getting ourselves, too.
Posted by: Texas T-bone at January 25, 2008 01:12 PMAlso wanted to tell you that Canon has announced its newest Digital Rebel, the XSi (450D), available this spring.
Your XT wants a new friend.
Posted by: Texas T-bone at January 25, 2008 01:13 PMThat just means you need to buy new skirts! See, isn't this fun? This from a girl who owns, count them, no less than FIFTEEN pairs of boots and still doesn't have outfits to wear with some of them. But I'm a firm believer that you can't pass on a fabulous boot if it is your size and within your price range. It's kind of like destiny.
And P.S. I'm not sure if September 2005 is when you first started dating Simon, or simply when you revealed it to the Internet, but that's the same week I started dating Scott -- he for whom I relocate to, where else but, San Francisco next week. And after 1.5 years of residing on opposite coasts (and a full year before that convincing him that our European fling was not an Expiration Relationship), he was totally worth the wait. So yes, good things do come.
Posted by: Camels & Chocolate at January 25, 2008 02:29 PMGood things do come to those who wait. Woohoo!
I love HJ's use of embiggened.
Yay for embiggening!
Posted by: Alyce at January 25, 2008 03:43 PMLucky you! I'm still looking for that just right fit, but I get it and I'm glad you have the boots that make you happy (and glad you are adaptable enough to know when you have something worth keeping even if you have to change your fantasy a teeny bit - I truly think that's half the battle). ;)
Posted by: K at January 25, 2008 09:21 PMPlease, please link to the boots if you know where to find them. I've been looking for the same thing for YEARS since my last pair spontaneously combusted.
Posted by: Kizz at January 26, 2008 10:49 AM
