Girl Stuff

Here's a rather personal question for all you ladies out there: How does one go about finding a gynocologist when one doesn't have any female friends to ask (coworkers don't count because I don't really want to cross that line with any of them) and when one doesn't want to go to Planned Parenthood because the nearest one is the ghetto?

I usually schedule my yearly exam for when I go back to SLC on vacation (where the PP is not exactly a luxury spa, but certainly not a table in an alley), but this year I missed it, so now I have to either find a doctor here in California or wait another four months until I go back home to get back on ye olde birthe controlle pille. That's a really long time to wait, if you ask Ethan.

Normally, I suppose one would see what doctors or clinics were covered by one's insurance plan and then select accordingly. The trouble is, because my company doesn't offer a very good package, I'm still on my parents' plan, which is unique to employees of the Utah state government, and hence doesn't apply to any of my options here. While that means I have to pay extra for an out-of-network doctor, it also means I can go anywhere I want. That sounds like a good thing, but it's actually the root of my problem because now, instead of choosing between five or ten doctors pre-selected by the insurance company, I have to wade through hundreds and hundreds of options. You see my problem now. I just don't feel right about opening up the phone book, closing my eyes, and pointing. Sure, I'd pick a racehorse or a presidential candidate if I liked the sound of his name, and I might pick a restaurant by the look of its sign, and I'd certainly judge a book by its cover, but I really don't want to rely on insubstantial instict when choosing someone to poke about where the sun don't shine. I may be acting like a baby here, but somehow I'm guessing I'm not alone.

Any ideas/advice/instructions? Better yet, anyone know how to get OrthoTriCyclen on the black market?

(On a hilarious sidenote, my dad wanted to make sure I knew it was okay to use his insurance card for such things, so he mentioned it on the phone a few months ago:

"You know, you can get our insurance to pay for things even if you're not at one of the local places," he said.

"I know," I said.

"You could get contact prescriptions, glasses."

"Yup."

"You could find a dentist there too, in case you didn't want to wait until you came home."

"I know."

"You could go to the crotch mechanic."

"Thanks, dad. I needed to hear that from you."

"Well..."

"No, really. Thanks. That's enough."

My dad is the king of understated crudity.)

wrote Leah at 6:41 AM | Comments (2)